I could never have come through all of this with a Christian counselor. Dealing with trauma, emotional things, marital problems, etc while going through deconstruction simply cannot be handled by someone who is committed to first and foremostly “saving lost sheep.” You are not a project. You are not a salvation target. You are a person and you need to be heard and taught how to walk through your own life.
When your entire worldview is seen through the distorted lens of the evangelical Christian church and purity culture, you don’t think about the consequences when you know that you’re right and they are wrong. No matter who it hurts.
Everything I did was to protect myself, my image, from the church people. It was all about how things looked to others. And most everyone I was friendly with at church were exactly the same way. It was all about the image. “Putting on the new man” and “getting rid of the old man” were all about making yourself appear as righteous and Christian-esque as you could. It had nothing to do with actually being a Christian.
Most non-Christians would be shocked to know the great lengths that Christians have gone to insulate themselves from The World. There really is a Christian Bubble, and we lived in it for nearly 20 years. We were told that we were to live IN the world but not be OF the world. Christians should be […]